Dawn’s Weight Loss Journey

I know. I know. It is truly shocking…LOL…

Actually, I am wrong plenty of times and unlike a lot of people in life, I often note when I am, and go about correcting any harm I may have caused…

Heck, sometimes I even take the blame for crap I didn’t do!! This is what happens when you spend a great deal of time in your own head analyzing things…

You not only find other’s imperfections but a great deal of your own too…

So last week I blogged about my frustration with the male brain, and in particular, Brian’s brain…

I got enough feedback to know that it sadly is not just a “Brian” thing…It is, apparently, a gender thing.

Okay. Fine. I get it…

This is all part of the Male package…

So I now have to decide if I can deal with this for the rest of my life…Or just say screw it, and become a female only zone…LOL…

In his defense, and much to my admiration, he did read my blog…

We waited a few days to discuss so that I could calm down and he could process…

So Sunday we have “The Talk”…And much like I had already known, he apologized for letting me down, promised to try harder, but also asked that I simply tell him what I want…This brought up my counter point that sometimes I just don’t want to tell you. Period. I want you to figure it out. And I think we just agreed to disagree at that point…

So flash forward to Sunday evening…And we are prepping our meals for the week…

And he starts packing my lunch. I am in the back bedroom he is in the kitchen…He yells back to confirm what sandwich I want. How much mayo to use, etc. (He knows I am counting calories, and this is why all the questions…)

I hear myself answering his questions…Not irritated in the least on this day…

Then I hear myself say “But please fold the meat in threes…And then crisscross the upper layer…”

He comes into the bedroom perplexed, half made sandwich in hand… “Umm, WHAT?”

I repeat “Well, I have to have the meat folded like this (And I use my hands to demonstrate) layered three across, and then a second layer of three folded across, but the other way…”

I apologize to him even as I am saying it for even I can hear that it sounds RIDICULOUS, but I can’t help it truly…It’s my OCD, honest…My meat HAS to lay this way or I won’t eat the sandwich…

(I do the same thing with Toast and PB and J’s too. HATE having anyone else make them for me because they don’t do it like I need it done…LOL)

He looks at me, almost on the verge of tears…GOOD tears…Laughter induced tears and says the truest words ever…

“And you REALLY expected me to do this on my own last week without asking you ANY questions?”

POINT TAKEN.

Brian 1= Dawn 0

I start laughing as well. And I APOLOGIZE to him, because it did suddenly strike me how ridiculous I was being from last week, because yes, even if he HAD packed my lunch, it wouldn’t have been right, and he would have heard about it…LOL…

The whole damned if you do damned if you don’t scenario…

So I gained a little more insight into myself and to this new relationship.

To Brian’s credit, I think his good natured, laid back-ness attitude is definitely a good counter balance to my intense, high strung-ness. It is fascinating though, to be 37 years of age, and STILL learning things about yourself…

It’s also interesting to be navigating the waters of a new relationship this late in the game…It has its frustrations for sure…But it also has a heck of a lot of “A-HA” moments…

Those moments you realize “Ahhh. So that’s what my ex was talking about…” LOL…

I am glad that I am open to it though…And I am glad that Brian has the patience of a saint when it comes to dealing with me…

Because I KNOW I am trying at times…And I KNOW my expectations are ridiculous most of the time…

But for some reason, the guy still hangs with me…

Must be my extreme good looks, my over abundance of charm, my keen sense of style, and my earth shattering wit…LOL…