I am the Lizard King…I can do ANYTHING…
Lizards.
I am from Ohio, you see…We dont have Lizards in Ohio. I mean, we do, but they are kept behind cages and tanks, in pet stores, homes, or zoos. They dont run around all willy nilly like!
Apparently, here in Florida, you cant walk two inches without one shooting across your path.
When I was down here last June visiting, I found this cute. Quaint, even…I mean, I AM an animal lover…Right?
Right.
So, about one month ago, I go into my bedroom to turn in for the night, and there on my wall is a lizard. He was ten feet long if he was anything!! (Okay. That might be a SLIGHT exageration…but he didnt look so quaint up there on my wall)
So in comes the man of the house, right??
He is going to catch this beast for me. Thats what men do…
So the chase begins.
All the while I am watching from my perch on the bed, legs and feet tucked up tightly under me, JUST in case!
So he catches the darn thing. For a mili second. He apparently caught him by the tail, and as I watched in absolute horror, this little thing dropped to the ground, with his tail STILL in Brian’s hand. WIGGLELING!!! It was STILL MOVING PEOPLE!!!! I screamed soooo loud. It was the grossest thing I had ever seen…
Now, to go back just a moment, this thing got into my house because my bedroom window is currently missing a screen. No big deal. We popped the window back open and assumed the damn thing would eventually find its way back out…
Ummm. NO…
A few weeks later, I return to the scene of the crime…And sure enough, the thing is hanging out on my closet door. How do I know it was OUR lizard? He had a little stump where his tail should have been.
The man is called. The chase begins. Again.
Again, his efforts are futile. (Have you seen these things move?? Like liquid lightening…)
Into my closet it goes. Great I think. ONe day I will be putting on a shirt and a dead lizard will fall out.
Now, I dont know how long a lizard can live inside, but I am assuming this thing has GOT to be hungry. I mean, I am sure we have bugs, but, enough to live on??
So, I resign myself to the fact that I am just gonna have to share my bedroom with this thing untill it dies. As long as it does not crawl on me, I think I am okay. Right?
Sure.
So, a few more weeks go by…I am CERTAIN that this thing is dead by now, or has left via the often left open window…
That brings me to today.
I decided to be productive, right? Gonna clean my kitchen right nicely…
Go to wipe down the counters, move the cannisters on my counter, and see something moving out of the corner of my eye…
WHAT THE?!?!?!
NO…
IT CANT BE!!!!
OMG…IT ISSSSS!!
I look at him.
He looks at me.
And I think something passed between us…
I appreciated his dedication to his cause. His will to survive. His stub had grown longer…But still not a full tail…
I wanted to catch him if ONLY to let the poor thing loose outside…
But after a breif nod, a quick HELLO THERE LITTLE LIZARD, he scurried off behind the stove.
I have named him Lou…
ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!! HEHEHE! Thanks for the laugh girl!
I needed it.
Hi Lou!
AHAHAHA! That’s adorable. Welcome, Lou!
Hahaha! Tell Lou hey from Maryland
And let him know Maryland is just an awful awful place and he reaaaaly should just enjoy it where he is. 
We actually had a bearded dragon briefly…her name was Lizzy (original I know). She was young so she was small but still creeped me out. I liked to watch her from the other side of the glass.
I remember visiting my sister in law in NC the first time…they had some there and it freaked me out to think of them running across my foot if I walked outside.
Glad you made friends at least…Im sure he appreciates it. Your too funny!!
OMG!! You are a trooper…I love animals, but not creepy crawlers like those!! Now I am off to read your previous blog because it caught my attention yesterday, but didn’t have a chance to read it!! Love and miss ya tons!
LOL! Too funny! I don’t know if I could handle that!
Wow, what a story. But if you don’t get lizards in Ohio, what is he doing there? A lost pet? Yikes. I can imagine standing on the bed screaming.
But, on the bright side, he’s in the Kitchen now, maybe that will stop any late night snacking!
LMAO…this is waaayyyy to friggin funny. Tell Lou I said hello
Great story, I love when unusual things happen to us in what seems like a very average day. It always makes for a good story and a little excitement. Fun, fun, fun. Naming him Lou is great since like the old saying goes, “If you can’t beat em join em.”
Lol…shudders at the thought though. I dont do creatures like that, though it is better then a snake.
Got ya new housemate named Lou huh. Thanks for sharing this story, pretty funny!
Debbie
Just to clarify…I am FROM Ohio, but now live in Florida!!
LOL- You tell a great story!
(Maybe you should close the window now or the rest of the family may be moving in soon!)
Teri
Rofl!!! Love it! So now you got a new pet!! Hee hee!
OMG that was hilarious! Thanks for the laugh I needed it. Give Lou my regards.
LOL good thing you named him.
I remember when we lived in North Carolina we were always getting creatures like that. From what I remember, there was really very little that we could do about it. Aside of learning to live with it and giving the little creatures names. 
hehe