Dawn’s Weight Loss Journey

I have been around buddyslim for a couple of years now…

Long enough to see many buddies come, and go, and come back again…

Some leave never to return…

Some return again and again…

Some buddies I met here became instant “soul mates”. People I connected to like no others. Cyberville is like that sometimes…I had one buddy here who I adored. We spoke almost daily. Off site. I just really liked her…

She hasnt logged in since early last year and I have no idea what she is up to now…

Throughout my years here, I have seen leaders come and go. And by leaders, I mean those members who come in strong. Like a breath of fresh air. They seem to breathe life and motivation into everyone around them. They inspire. They lift up. They fall, and get back up. Some do it by blogging daily for all of us to read. Some hang out in the forums. Some become great challenge leaders. Yep, I have seen many…

They come, and sadly, they go…

And while I have always read, and followed their successes, in hopes of catching a bit of their success, its been quite a while since a leader has really inspired me. And not because they havent been inspiring…Its because I was not yet ready to be inspired.

See. THAT my friends, is the number one rule of this journey that I have learned. Aint nothing going to happen to you unless you are ready. And there is no magic pill to make you ready. You either are or you arent. And if you arent, you will not be successful no matter how many times you go through the motions…You simply must decide now is your time, and you simply go for it. You must be open and honest with yourself and others. You must make some sacrafices. Period. Whether it be time in the form of exercise. Time away from friends and family. Or in the form of food.

YES. You will have to give up some foods on this journey. Period.

YES. You will eventually have to exercise on this journey. Period.

You can NOT have your cake and eat it too. And if you dont get that. Or arent ready to do that, then you simply arent ready to be here. Period.

Now. With all that said, in the years I have been on this journey, I have had great success, and great failure. I have lost, and gaine, and lost, and gained. My story is like many others. But I have not given up in the five years I have been doing this.

I decided in January of 2004 to lose weight for the first time in my life…And I have never ever let go of that desire. FIVE years its has taken me to learn the lessons I have learned…

At the most, I have lost 64 pounds…At the most, I have regained 25 pounds. On again, off again…

But I have never ever given up. Even when I have appeared to be off the wagon, I havent really been.

Fitness. Food. Weight loss has become such a part of my life, I can no longer separate myself from it. It is me. All of it. And it will always be. I will always always fight this battle for the rest of my life. I know this.

So here I am. January of 2009. Five years into this life changing journey. And boy o boy, has it been!!!!

Deciding to lose weight was the greatest gift I gave myself. And I am ready to, once again, continue the gift giving…I am ready for 2009 to be a year of great success for me…

So…Back to this leaders board…

I dont think its any surprise that one of our biggest success stories. Leaders. Cheerleader. Whatever you want to call her is Miss Nancy. Now. I dont know Nancy like some of you know her.

I read her from afar. We chit chat through forums or blogs. But I dont KNOW her. Only what she has allowed me to know through her words. But I read her blogs for inspiration. HOping SOMETHING will click with me.

And finally…After months of reading…Something did…

Yesterday, I read these words:  “From size 18 to size 5.  If I can do it…. YOU CAN TOO!!”

And it happened. It clicked.

Simple sentence. She probably has no idea how that sentence affected one person. Most of the time, we blog to help ourselves, not really understanding how our words affect others…

I read that sentence over and over.

I thought about it.

Went to the gym and focused on it.

And I thought to myself…”YES. I CAN DO IT!!”

I am a size 16. Truly. My ultimate goal is a size 9. Why?

Well, breifly, I will tell you. I read a book once that your true body shape and size is the weight and size you were around your 18/19th year. Well. I was a size 9. And I looked damn good. So a size 9 is my ULTIMATE goal…

All this time, I have been thinking I will get there EVENTUALLY…Some day…

Well, suddenly, yesterday, I was thinking, WHY NOT NOW?

Its FOUR sizes. FOUR sizes away…Thats NOTHING really.

I can do that in 2009.

Nancy did it. She doesnt have super powers. She is not some magical being from another planet. She is a woman. Just like me. With lifes ups and downs. Just like me.

You see. Nancy IS just like us. The difference is, she is DOING what we all WANT to do. What we are TRYING to do.

So thank you Nancy. For putting a fire under my ass yesterday. For allowing me to FINALLY see that YES. I CAN DO THIS.

I hope that next year, I will be sitting here writting MY new years blog and saying, “From a size 16 to a 9″…

And I hope I will somehow pass the torch onto the next buddy out there. Struggling…