I am amazed…
Happy Sunday all!
It is absolutely gorgeous here in Central Ohio…Sun is shining and the air is cool…YAY…
Soooo. I had an interesting weekend…
I went out Friday with my sister and met up with a new friend of mine…I should say, an OLD new friend….You see, I had met this guy YEARS ago, as a very lose aquaintance of my husband…
By a VERY strange twist of fate (Is there such a thing??) he re-entered my life a few months ago, (Its a very clever story how it came about, but I will save that for another day!)…. Anyway, he is going through separation as well, and he and I have become really good friends…The cool thing is, my husband knows him, and likes him, so our friendship is out in the open, and it seems to make everyone more comfortable…
So he met up with us, and we all had a really fun time…
The thing is, he shared some thoughts on me that I had not really heard for a while…Apparently, he had observed me and my sister for a few minutes before making his prescence known at the bar…
The things he shared were good…Dont get me wrong, however, it is still so very bizarre to me to hear people discribe me in ways I am not used too…For even after sooo many years on this journey, I still have a very VERY hard time seeing myself as others now see me…
He called us Intrigueing. Delightful. Outgoing. (Now, for anyone to call me outgoing is really really odd, for I have spent most of my life describing myself as shy and introverted) somehow. Someway. I have turned that around and I dont really remember doing so…He also told me I was cute…Which I have been feeling anything but, lately…To hear this, from a friend who is nothing more then a friend, well, it gave me lots of things to ponder this weekend…
For I sooooo want to be everything that he described. Yet I dont really feel I am…I have been feeling really down about myself lately…Disappointed in allowing myself to regain some weight and fall of the wagon. I have been feeling fat and unattractive…And it was nice to hear such honest feelings from a third party not associated with much of my up and down battle…
My sister left me alone for a while while she went to get a drink. And I was talking to one of HER friends, a complete stranger to me…We carried on a conversation like we were long lost pals. I would NEVER have done that in my previous life. I would have been mortified to be left alone with a stranger…
Soooo. I have been heavy in my thoughts this weekend…Trying to stay motivated to commit and win this challenge I have joined…And then what should happen then my back pain flares up again this weekend. So I did NOT work out yesterday…
So I said “What the hell, i will just start on Monday”
But then I talked to myself about Friday…And said SELF…Just because you cant exercise doesnt mean you can eat like a maniac. So I kept myself in check yesterday…Today, I got up, took my dog for a walk/run then I headed to the workout room…
What is it about working out that makes me feel instantly TEN TIMES better…IMMEDIATELY I felt better. Mentally and physically. THIS IS WHAT I NEED TO REMEMBER…
And I am amazed…
Soooo. I am NOT waiting till Monday…I am starting now…Yesterday, in fact…
To try to be the person INSIDE my head that some of my friends already see on the outside…
This is my new goal…
I want to be AMAZING…
Take care all!!!!
What a wonderful goal indeed and although I have never seen you in person and shared a meal or drink with you, I’ve always known you’re an amazing woman. Sure Dawnie, we all have bumps on the road that make us stumble some, but you keep at it and that’s THE MOST IMPORTANT thing not only on this WL journey, but in life.
Well, I have always sen you as outgoing and delightful just from your blogs! i love your energy! I too, am having to see myself as others see me, and it is an eyeopener! Always thought I was a shy little mouse, and it just isn’t so! Not anymore! Good job, Dawnie, so proud of you!
it is what it is,
You are an amazing person! You and your blogs inspire me so much!
Have a good one!
Shy and introverted? YOU?????