Emerging…
Wow…It’s been a while again, huh??
I am ever so sorry about that…
I have been trying very hard to make my way back to this site for quite some time now…For some reason I cant quite get back on the wagon as far as buddyslim goes…
I come on to check emails and update my ticker, but that pretty much takes up all my energy these days…
So, I won’t give you a lengthy explanation, as I really don’t think this is the place to do so…
But did want to say that I have been gone battling my own demons, so to speak.
I have not felt comfortable blogging for quite some time, because, well, this is a weight loss support site, not a depression support site…In addition to that, I don’t know about you guys, but sometimes you just want to say “ENOUGH ALREADY” when you read blog after blog about the same thing…
So that is why I primarily pulled away. I have sought help, and am receiving help for the first time in my 35 years from my personal physician, a counselor, and the help of medication.
I should also say I am getting some incredible support from a few friends and my family, of course…I tried to pull away from all of them too, but a few of them refused to let me…And I thank them for their determination…This was an extremely big step, and incredibly hard step for me. To admit defeat, so to speak…I could not battle this one alone, and it was not easy to reach out for help…
Depression, anxiety, and all sorts of darkness runs in my family, and I fought it for a long time because of that…
I am (used to be) extremely independent, a perfectionist, and incredibly hard on myself. So to admit there were things going on in my life that were irrational, and beyond my control, well…Lets just say it hasn’t been easy…
Soooo…I am now being treated, and so far, so good…Baby steps, right???
I imagine, like most things, my recovery will be slow, but I have lots of hope that I can get back to the sparkling, vibrant person I was…I miss that girl a lot…And I don’t feel like I have truly seen her since this time last year…
I am excited to welcome her back…
So, to end on a somewhat happier note, my diet is finally under control…100% actually for the first time in months…
I think this is a side affect of the other chaos in my life…My diet. My weight is the one thing I CAN control right now…So I have channeled some of my OCD over into that…In a positive way…
So I have dropped several pounds in the last two weeks…
I am hoping for a really nice weigh in come Friday…I can feel a good one coming…YAY!!! Finally!!!
I will continue to update my ticker and weigh in here, and I hope to eventually get back to blogging and reading blogs…That is a goal of mine, as it truly did help me…
I appreciate those of you who have sent private emails to me…It is nice to be gone for a while, to pop in, and notice that someone has missed you…Very nice feeling…
Finally, I would like to send a GIANT congratulations to my buddy Catrina who has truly become the epitome of a true weight loss success story by closing in on a 100 pound weight loss in 7 months…Truly an inspiration to anyone who felt they just cant do it…She has just proven to all of you that you can…
I’m sorry to hear about your situation right now. I understand how much damage depression can do. If you do need to vent, just go for it. That’s why we are all here. If we get it out sometimes it helps and keeps us on track.
On a side note,….wow, just looked at your pictures. What a difference!
I’m so glad to hear from you again. I know you’re getting the help you need and that you’ll be back to that girl you knew last year in no time.
We miss you here Dawnie, but we all want you to focus on you. Take care of yourself and come back to us when you can.
((((hugs))))
You are missed Dawnie
I’m so happy that you are getting help even though it was hard for you to do so.
Thanks for the update I have been wondering how you were doing.
Its great that you are taking care of yourself.
Thats the most important thing.
Take care Dawnie
Lori
You are truly missed Dawn!! You were here for me from day 1 on buddy slim.
I wish all the luck!!
Take care of yourself,
Tanis
I am glad to hear that things are turning around for you and everything is getting back on track for you!
Have a good one!
Have really missed you, Dawnie. I hear ya, have had my own bouts with depression and OCD, too. Glad you are getting some help. Congrats on your weight loss, too. Hey we are all here for you, blog on whatever you need to write about! Huggs!
You said, “To admit defeat, so to speak” and I say you have triumphed! I understand where you are coming from EXACTLY. To recognize that you cannot carry the burden on your shoulders any longer and to seek help, THAT is the most courageous thing anyone can do for themselves. Dawnie, THAT is strength at is best!
Take all the time you want my sweet friend and if you need me, give me a holla!
Dawnie,
I’ve missed you too!! I’m so glad that you’re raising up from the depths of the dark hole. I’m just climbing out myself!!